


A Few Words

by justanotherblondewriter



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Pain, just because someone posted this as a comic and i had to punch an even larger hole in my heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-02
Updated: 2018-04-02
Packaged: 2019-04-17 01:39:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14177769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanotherblondewriter/pseuds/justanotherblondewriter
Summary: After three weeks back on the Ark, Raven manages to bring a few systems back online in hopes of gaining a connection to the bunker back on Earth. But when a lost friend makes an unexpected appearance, the group takes a moment to reflect on them.Or, the one where Raven accidentally reminds everyone that Clarke Griffin is dead and none of them got to say goodbye.Inspired by the comic drawn by Randomstuffthatinspiresme on Tumblr. I'll post a link within!





	A Few Words

**Author's Note:**

> Find the comic at http://randomstuffthatinspiresme.tumblr.com/post/171978539640/bellarke-angst-yaaaay-since-this-has-been-in-my
> 
> The idea entirely belongs to the artist linked above, I only let her drawing inspire me! I did, however, add to/change the dialogue a bit. Enjoy!

The Earth Monitoring Center is exactly as Raven remembered it being. Well, almost.

It isn't as clean as it had been, the white of the walls, hardware, and furniture completely compromised. The once crisp white room was instead an ugly soot-color, with hints of brown and black outlining almost the entirety of the room. Fires from after her departure had done a fair bit of damage to a lot of the hardware, a few circuit boards had seen much better days. But Raven was by no means a quitter, and she had every bit of belief that if anyone can get it up and running, it was her.

Which was exactly why she'd been spending the last three days there, tinkering with every bit of equipment she could get her fingers on. Monty and Harper were kind enough to bring her food, knowing she wouldn't be leaving the center until she either knew for certain there was no saving the systems, or she proved she could. The food, well, it wasn't great. Monty had managed to get the algae farm producing about a week ago, for which they were all thankful, but God did it have its drawbacks.

Harper and Monty were there when it happened.

"Fuck!" Raven snapped, shoving herself out from underneath the main keyboard. She lifted her finger to her mouth, sucking on the shocked appendage before slipping back inside the mainframe.

Monty shared a look with the blonde beside him, eyebrow raised as he directed his question to Raven, "You alright?" Him and Harper were seated by the door on the floor, legs outstretched in front of them, empty plates beside them. Raven's sat a little farther off - untouched. When she didn't reply, he spoke again, "Raven, you gotta eat. You won't be able to keep this up much longer if you don't maintain your energy."

"Monty's right," Harper piped up, getting a word in before the other woman could retaliate. "I know how badly you want to get this working, but it's not worth you blacking out over." A silent 'again' sat in the air between the three of them.

From her spot among wires, Raven scowled. "Okay Mom and Dad, five more minutes," she muttered, reaching up to intertwine a couple of wires together with her fingers. It wasn't the best solution, but she figured it will work, at least for now. Part of her understood that they were only nagging her for her own good, but sometimes she couldn't help but think none of them could grasp just how important this was. This room had the strongest ties to the frequencies down on Earth. If she could tap into those frequencies and amplify them, there was a good chance they could get in touch with the bunker.

It would be nice for all of them to hear the voices of those they cared about.

Her eyes widen as a spark kicks up in front of her and the sound of the massive computer warming up filled the air around her. "Yes!" She barked out, laughing as she detangled herself and stood up to beam at her fellow Ark-ians. "I'm such a goddamn _genius_ , what would you all have done here without me?" Her tone implied nothing but sheer pride as she stepped in front of the keyboard, typing a few things in as the screen popped up. "Guys, you've got to get in here!" Her voice raised, knowing the others were close enough that they'd hear her. Rarely did any of them go too far from the rest. Looking over her shoulder, she laughed loudly as she yelled, "I got the Earth Monitoring computer work-" The words died on her lips when she turned, the image on the screen fuzzy but viewable. "-ing."

Rushing footsteps thunder in through the door as Harper and Monty take their places at Raven's side, neither able to say anything. Emori and Murphy entered first, neither in too large of a hurry, but they both gasped when they saw who looked back at them. Bellamy was quicker to enter, but he made no noise as he came to a halt, Echo almost running into the back of him but quickly sidestepping to avoid doing so.

"It must have been left up on the screen when the Ark's systems started to fail after that forced launched," Raven explained, her voice just higher than a whisper.

Clarke Griffin stared back at them, 'NO SIGNAL' blinking beside her picture in bright red. She appeared clean, with no blood, dirt, grime, or otherwise on her. Her skin was smooth, no markings, bruises, or flaws of any kind. None of them can remember having ever seen her so...innocent. She looked much younger.

But it's Clarke alright. There's a hard set to her jaw and a determined glint in that steely gaze, daring whoever took her photo to say the wrong thing. 

Harper is the first to break the silence, looking up and down at the group of them. "We should say a few words."

When no one took a step forward, Emori cleared her throat. "I'll go first." Looking up at the image of Clarke, she shrugged. "Clarke didn't know me, and I didn't know her. So I can't say I blame her for wanting to test the Nightblood on me. I had lied and in doing so, gotten man killed. It would've made sense. But...she didn't go through with it. Instead, she used herself. Risked her own life for mine. A woman she didn't even know. I owe her my life. Three times over, now."

Murphy's hand lifted, placing gently against Emori's back. His relationship with Clarke had always been a struggle. They'd fought over everything, had hated each other at times. But he could hardly remember a time when he truly wanted her dead. Even after all they'd put one another through, they'd come back from it. "Clarke did try to hang me. And then she did banish me," he grunted, rolling his eyes, "which led to being tortured by Grounders..." He trailed off, shaking his head. "But she did give Emori her suit. I think that makes us even in my book." He nodded at her image, his eyes moving away from her unwavering gaze after a moment. He wouldn't admit it allowed, maybe not even to Emori, but he missed her.

"I can still remember how terrified I was on Mount Weather," Harper began suddenly, a hand coming up to grip at the edge of her frayed shirt. "I can still remember the drills," she whispered, closing her eyes tightly. "But what Clarke did to get me out of there...To get The 100 out of there...I can't imagine how she lived with it. And the list, I forgave her for it. It must have killed her to write it." Swallowing, she leaned into Monty, blinking hard to hold back tears. She wished she'd gotten a chance to tell Clarke how she felt. How she understood why she'd made the choices she'd made.

An arm around Harper's shoulder, Monty took a deep breath in and sighed. "I don't know what we would have done without Clarke, especially in the beginning. After seeing a spear impale Jasper, it was her that formed the group to go get him back. It was her that didn't even think to rush over and get him down from the tree they'd bound him to, without so much as thinking of herself. She never gave up on him." His throat became think and he choked up, right hand coming up to press against his pursed lips. If only they'd had more time...If only things hadn't gone south. He wanted to tell her so many things. He wanted to apologize for how he'd reacted about the list. He wanted to talk to her about Jasper. "She never gave up on any of us. The 100."

"Wanheda was a true warrior. One the world will not know again in a thousand years. I see now why my King respected her as he did," Echo said, her voice sure and strong. Clarke had never been her favorite person. But she was a strong woman. Echo would've been proud to go into battle with or against her. "She was smart. And without her, we'd all be dead. It is an unpayable debt we owe."

Hands pressed heavily into the command center, Raven's shoulders shook. "Clarke killed Finn. I hated her for it. But I eventually realized she'd saved us all by doing it. She'd even saved Finn. I hate that I wasted so much time hating her. She became one of my closest friends. I miss her so much. If I had had half the strength she did..." Swallowing, the mechanic shook her head. Tears flowed freely down her cheeks. The two of them had had so much potential. Their friendship had truly only been at its beginning. With more time, they would've been best friends. "She made sacrifice after sacrifice for us. It didn't matter what it cost her, it was always worth it to save us."

A long silence stretched between the group, a handful of sniffles heard as they tried to pull their emotions into check. Another beat of quiet and finally Raven straightened out her shoulders, lifting the strap of her tank top to wipe away the tears clinging to her eyelashes. She caught sight of Bellamy, a few feet from the rest of them, his head lowered. His dark curls fell over his eyes, shadowing them from view.

"Bellamy?" She said softly, moving over to him. "Don't you want to say something?" Raven had never been ignorant to the bond Bellamy and Clarke had shared. No one could overlook the way the two had been so willing to throw themselves into the line of fire for one another. How quickly they would've jumped on a grenade for the other.

Bellamy lifted his head, eyes landing hard on the picture of Clarke. His jaw clenched tightly, hands forming fists at his sides. His emotions threatened to overtake him, but he'd spent enough time in mourning. He couldn't afford to use up any more of his time by allowing the past to swallow him. She'd told him that he needed to use his brain, not just his heart. He understood that now. If only it wasn't so hard.

His voice was soft when it finally came out, "This...All of this, we..." A lump formed in his throat but he swallowed it down. "We should have told Clarke this before. But she's dead now. She isn't listening." Tearing his gaze away from the screen, he looked down as if staring at the ground hard enough would burn the memory of her face away. But it was too late. She'd already imprinted herself behind his eyelids. "Now, all we can do is survive in her name. And deal with all the things left unsaid."

Stepping around Raven, he moved to the keyboard, hand hovering over the buttons. He couldn't help it, he looked up again, lost momentarily in the blue of Clarke's fierce gaze. At the time, had she known what would await her? Did she have any idea the sacrifices she would eventually make? Would her expression have been any different if she'd been aware of all the pain and suffering she'd eventually have to endure? He knew the answer was no. No, Clarke would have faced it all head on and shoulders straight. "I'll deal with having not told her I loved her," he admitted, the words burning like black rain as they pushed up past his lips. He hit the power button on the keyboard, the computer screen going black in front of them. "We shouldn't waste power."

Backing away from the motherboard, he hesitated for only a moment before turning around and exiting the room.

Murphy's gaze followed him, "Fuck."


End file.
